Sorry It's Been So Long

I know. It's been a very long time since I've been on my blog and without explanation to boot. I don't want to bore you with long drawn out  stories so I will try to make a long story short.

Once upon a time, in January 2013, I began to pass out with warning and began to suffer from excruciating headaches. The headaches and the passing out were so terrible I was unable to work. I went thought test after test and doctor after doctor without an explanation for what was happening to me. I even took a trip up to Cleveland Clinic. Even the doctor's a Cleveland Clinic couldn't pin down what was happening to me. The trip to Cleveland took place in August 2013 (keep in mind, this whole time, I'm still not working). So, I took a chance in September, 2013 and saw a new Neurologist at University of Cincinnati. He agreed with a couple of the other neurologists I had seen. So, finally, I had a diagnosis:  Psuedotumor Cerebri aka Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension. But, he felt the condition was better treated by a headache specialist. So, I finally (whew), after almost 10 months, not only had a diagnosis but also a specialist. My first appointment with the headache specialist was in the end of October 2013. Right about know you are asking, "Um, Miranda, what's pseudotumor cerebri?" Basically, it's a condition in which the pressure inside my skull is increased for no obvious reason. The symptoms mimic those of a brain tumor, but no brain tumor is present. I am currently being treated successfully with 2 medications. Should medical treatment fail, surgical intervention may be necessary.

As relieved as I was to finally be on the right track, I was still in a lot of pain, though not passing out as often, if at all, and I was an emotional wreck. That being said. An emotional wreck is not a good state for a girl to be in who has spent the  majority of her life with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder. So, when I started to realize my emotions weren't exactly the most stable, I started to reach out to anyone who would listen. Unfortunately, no one would listen. I think this was mostly due to the fact that I really couldn't pin point what exactly what wrong with me, I just knew that I was broken, I just wasn't right.  It wasn't until after Christmas that I was able to convince my psychiatrist that something was wrong. His solution was to change my antidepressant. In hindsight, which we all know is 20/20, this was not a good idea. As I weaned off the medication I had been on for years and began to taper onto the new medication I was fine. It wasn't until the old medication had been completely stopped that I noticed the change. Before switching over the medications, I was depressed and just kind of "blah." Once the old medication had been completely stopped and I was only on the new medication, I was angry, very, very angry. And I lost every filter I ever had. I said and did things and I didn't care who they hurt or what the consequences were. Now, I have pretty much always spoken what's on my  mind, but this was different. Over the years I had learned to speak my mind in a way that isn't always brash and painful, this was balls to the wall evil, mean girl action. The reaction to the medication was so bad, I actually ended up in the hospital for about a week because the doctor and my family were afraid I might hurt myself or someone else. While, being hospitalized sucked, they were able to find a new medication (only one) that takes the place of all 3 of the medications I was on prior to the whole ugly incident.

The name of the medication my doctor put me on, the one that did not agree with me, was Viibryd. While in the hospital, one of the nurses was telling me that she knew of 3 people personally that had bad reactions to the medication. So, when I got home, I looked it up on the net. Well, it seems that only a select few have actually done well with the medication. My reaction seems to be of the more extreme variety, but still, it doesn't seem like there is much good information out there. It was definitely easier to find information on how it caused bad reactions versus the good information.

So, There is my year in a nutshell as well as an explanation as to kind of my downward spiral and lack of activity of my blog for the last few months. Needless to say, my craft room had been abandoned for a while and I think evil crafty gnomes broke in and scattered stuff all over the place. I went in about a week ago and was so overwhelmed I almost turned right around and said "F@*& it!" But, I didn't. I took several days and actually rearranged, pitched, dusted, organized, etc. and now I think I might be ready to start some light crafting again.  Woo Hoo!!!!!!  No, I know I said I would probably never share my crafting space, but I thought I would go ahead and show you. Keep in mind, I live in a very small  house, I have no real "crafting furniture" and everything is just kind of thrown together from what I have found at good will, garage sales, etc.

Thanks for stopping by. Sorry it's been so long.

Miranda